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BACK ISSUES INTERVIEWS Stand-Up Comedians Jim Norton Robert Kelly Donnell Rawlings Brad Stine Tammy Pescatelli Leighann Lord George Sarris Nick DiPaolo Russ Meneve Shang and more By Tasha Harris, NYC Comedy Journalist STAGE TIME The Magazine That Stands Up For Comedy |
When they know that you need them, then you’re trying to reach them and you give them the
power to make you feel uncomfortable, they enjoy that power corrupt. They already feel powerless
because you’re on stage and you’re already been told that you’re the most important muthafucker at that time in that room and you give them power to take that away. So, it’s like "fuck you, you goofy dog-loving cocksuckers." You take power out of someone’s hands and then they want to be attached to you. I don’t give audiences power. I don’t need them. I need people who are real and people who get me.
Other comics came up before you and couldn’t get the audience’s attention. What is it about you
that--
I try to do the right thing. I tried to do the same jokes, get the money; but I was miserable. I
didn’t try to take it to another level; didn’t test what I could say. I just killed. I was in a zone
about five, six years ago where I was like I’m going to be the guy who just does well. I’m not
going to piss anyone off and I can’t function like that. It happened out of depression, out
necessity. It’s either that or not do comedy. ‘Cause I would quit if I had to figure out how to be
funny all the fuckin’ time.
What do you think is missing in standup today?
Funny muthafuckers. People who funny mean something to, not niggas who tell jokes. Laughter
is a culture. It’s like something you need everyday. I know people who can’t survive without
comedy and I’m one of them. I don’t have a back-up plan. I’m finished without this shit.
If you could change anything about the comedy business, what would it be?
More funny people. The business will do what it wants to do. No more cornballs. No comics who
judge you. Comics who sit there and go “that’s inappropriate.” A comic who says “inappropriate”
should die.
Do you think women are funny?
NO! There are probably some funny women floating around. Most women aren’t funny. Women
don’t laugh at everything. They don’t think everything is funny. Women are here so that the
world continues to exist. If it was up to men, the evil of this world would take it over. Women are
here to go “ah” to add that nurturing instinct, not to laugh and pain and suffering. Men are
here to laugh at pain and suffering. Women are here to say “don’t do that.” That’s the dynamic.
There’s no silly women that just laugh at people farting and tripping. Men are
silly.
What’s your advice to the new comics who do standup to get a sitcom deal?
Get what you deserve. Hopefully, you’ll get what you wished for. Because if you’re doing it for
that, you’re not going to be happy just like these fucking idiots that do it for that. People are
always telling me, why ain’t you this or why don’t you have that? I’m happy. I’m a multi-
hundredaire. I have a lot of hundreds.
What are your goals? Do you want your own show, record a comedy album, do movies?
I don’t have any. Everything that I’ve gotten is due to the fact that I’ve been loyal to standup.
If I get a movie, it’s extra. If I get TV, it’s extra.
If you could create a reality show, what would it be about?
A reality show that follows the losers from reality shows. The American Idol losers: What are they
doing now? All the comics from Last Comic Standing. All the people whose 15 minutes ticked away.
That’s the name of it: 14 Minutes and Counting.
- Tasha Harris, June 2004
power to make you feel uncomfortable, they enjoy that power corrupt. They already feel powerless
because you’re on stage and you’re already been told that you’re the most important muthafucker at that time in that room and you give them power to take that away. So, it’s like "fuck you, you goofy dog-loving cocksuckers." You take power out of someone’s hands and then they want to be attached to you. I don’t give audiences power. I don’t need them. I need people who are real and people who get me.
Other comics came up before you and couldn’t get the audience’s attention. What is it about you
that--
I try to do the right thing. I tried to do the same jokes, get the money; but I was miserable. I
didn’t try to take it to another level; didn’t test what I could say. I just killed. I was in a zone
about five, six years ago where I was like I’m going to be the guy who just does well. I’m not
going to piss anyone off and I can’t function like that. It happened out of depression, out
necessity. It’s either that or not do comedy. ‘Cause I would quit if I had to figure out how to be
funny all the fuckin’ time.
What do you think is missing in standup today?
Funny muthafuckers. People who funny mean something to, not niggas who tell jokes. Laughter
is a culture. It’s like something you need everyday. I know people who can’t survive without
comedy and I’m one of them. I don’t have a back-up plan. I’m finished without this shit.
If you could change anything about the comedy business, what would it be?
More funny people. The business will do what it wants to do. No more cornballs. No comics who
judge you. Comics who sit there and go “that’s inappropriate.” A comic who says “inappropriate”
should die.
Do you think women are funny?
NO! There are probably some funny women floating around. Most women aren’t funny. Women
don’t laugh at everything. They don’t think everything is funny. Women are here so that the
world continues to exist. If it was up to men, the evil of this world would take it over. Women are
here to go “ah” to add that nurturing instinct, not to laugh and pain and suffering. Men are
here to laugh at pain and suffering. Women are here to say “don’t do that.” That’s the dynamic.
There’s no silly women that just laugh at people farting and tripping. Men are
silly.
What’s your advice to the new comics who do standup to get a sitcom deal?
Get what you deserve. Hopefully, you’ll get what you wished for. Because if you’re doing it for
that, you’re not going to be happy just like these fucking idiots that do it for that. People are
always telling me, why ain’t you this or why don’t you have that? I’m happy. I’m a multi-
hundredaire. I have a lot of hundreds.
What are your goals? Do you want your own show, record a comedy album, do movies?
I don’t have any. Everything that I’ve gotten is due to the fact that I’ve been loyal to standup.
If I get a movie, it’s extra. If I get TV, it’s extra.
If you could create a reality show, what would it be about?
A reality show that follows the losers from reality shows. The American Idol losers: What are they
doing now? All the comics from Last Comic Standing. All the people whose 15 minutes ticked away.
That’s the name of it: 14 Minutes and Counting.
- Tasha Harris, June 2004